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Joke of the Day

"Why did the punctuation mark have such an easy time going out with other punctuation marks? It was a comma dating."

"Good friends are just like snowballs. They go away if you pee on them."

"Court decision: ""I hereby find you guilty of clickbait, and sentence you to death by electric chair...... ....what happens next will shock you."""

"[Concert] Triangle player: *proudly playing his triangle [Octagon player struts on stage] Triangle player: ""What the-"""

"Dear whoever ate my fries while I was in the ball pit at McDonalds... Not funny, grow up."

"If you want world peace, your army should be made up of massage therapists. I mean, who could fight while getting a relaxing massage?"

"-Boss: ""Send me one of your funny tweets"" -Me: ""I'm working at the moment, I'll send you one later"" -Boss: ""Hahaha! Send me another one."""

"What did Elmo take before he left the tickle factory? Two test tickles"

"I had a dream last night that I killed all those shirtless guys with ""swag"" and their duck-face girlfriends too. It was the Yolocaust."

"Sally Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally."