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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I'm nervous on a business call, I just envision the person on the other end of the phone as a muppet."

"How come the steel clad soldiers from the Ming Dynasty lost to the Knights of Eastern Europe? They had a chink in their armor."

"What does a Blond do every Sunday? Swallow Jesus."

"People say I'm a plagiarist Their word, not mine"

"If someone feeds you alphabet soup... Is that putting words in your mouth? Also, if they are about to feed you and pull back, is that taking the words out of your mouth?"

"If I were a movie villain I'd make a bomb where the wires are all one color."

"Everything is made in China... Except for babies, they are made in vachina."

"""So You've Been Drinking and You Think You Can Dance?"" That is definitely a reality show I would watch."

"Why did Hitler prefer apples to oranges? He didn't like the juice."

"British woman suing McDonalds after finding a cigarette in her ONE year old's Happy Meal.As if ciggie wasn't the healthiest thing in the bag"