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Joke of the Day

"Which place has the strongest gravity in the whole universe? Bed"

"If all men are the same, why do women take so long to choose one...?"

"Mr Circle went to go see a doctor after being stabbed... The doctor said his blood loss was very sphere"

"Did you hear about the guy who kept shooting birds? He was charged with First Degree Burder."

"What do gyms and prisons have in common? They both have ripped assholes"

"""We should definitely let dolphins go into space instead of monkeys"" said one scientist obviously not a dolphin dressed up as a scientist"

"[interview after finishing last in the olympics] do you regret saying ""I could win this race wearing flip flops"" [pulls mic close] yes"

"Whats brown and sticky A stick"

"I've been reading a book about the history of glue. I can't put it down!"

"NO...I don't ""make plans"" because plans suggest INTENT... ...which is typically the distinction between second & first degree convictions."