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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bail."

"Guys Trip to Vegas My wife asked me after our guys trip to Vegas if I had thought of her while I was there. Apparently, ""only to keep from coming too soon"" was not a very good answer."

"What did Leonardo DiCaprio say when he planted a seed? Inception"

"My First reddit Joke: Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware store? Because he was looking for a tight seal!"

"Gay bashing is terrible but gay dashing is just how we get from place to place."

"What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Convincing their family to consent to it!"

"Not a joke. I just wish more jokes were shorter."

"Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. The piano player can do that with his left hand."

"I've got washboard abs. As soon as I can find someone with clay-jug abs and someone with jews-harp abs, we can get started on our old-timey-hobo-band abs."

"Not sure what my dog thinks I do all day, but based on her excitement when I get home she apparently lives in constant fear I'll be murdered"