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Joke of the Day

"Sorry I was asleep when you texted me and just woke up when we ran into each other just now"

"""Isn't it strange how we were all once an egg?"" I told my wife. ""Well, grandpa still is,"" interrupted my son."

"How did Chernobyl disaster happen ? scientist A : Are you sure ? scientist B : Trust me, I know what i'm doing."

"Wanna here a joke? Women's rights. Sorry if this has been posted before."

"How do you help a Jew with ADHD? Send him to a concentration camp."

"You're 16 and miss the 90's? Yeah, I'm sure those were the best 3 years of your life. Shitting in your pants and eating crayons."

"So I developed a new biological weapon the other day... But then another mad scientist called me out, saying he developed the exact same thing a week before. He sued me for plaugeirizing."

"Boss: I'll tell you what I want Me: So tell me what you want, what you really really want *office breaks into Spice Girls dance routine"

"A joke for the ages Le COCKoon"

"Damn girl, if you was a fruit you'd be a fineapple, if you was a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital as often as I could."