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Joke of the Day

"At the grocery store, buying 6 of the same item Cashier: Are these good? Me: No. I'm buying all of them just to save others from suffering"

"When police tell you to put your hands up and stop running you can still legally flee with a rapid series of cartwheels."

"Welcome to Dick's hotdogs, if you like hotdogs, you'll love dicks."

"Did you hear about that frog that broke a bone? Yea he broke a ribbet"

"*puts seashell up to ear* Me: I think I can hear the ocea- Seashell: Seven days. You will die in seven days. Me: (to friend) It's for you."

"What did the German Kaiser roll say to the French baguette? *Gluten tag*"

"What do white guys do that lasts hours and makes white women scream? NASCAR"

"If I had a dime for every nickel I had I would have three cents"

"If you're feeling lonely, dim the lights and watch a good horror movie. By the end of it, you won't feel like you're alone anymore."

"What do you call a bulletproof Irishman? Rick O'Shea."