136322

Joke of the Day

"What did the unimpressed wind turbine say? I'm not a fan."

"What do you call an online encyclopedia for DJs? A wiki-wiki-wi-wi-wi-kipedia"

"Whoever drew the food pyramid forgot to coat the outside in Ranch dressing."

"A body was found.... In the bus station early this morning. A man was drowned in milk, buried in Cheerios, with a banana stuxk in his ass. Police suspect a cereal killer...."

"WEDDINGH NIGHT What is long and hard and a Polish bride gets on her wedding night? A new last name"

"[iphone vibrates] 3yo: daddy someone is texting you [landline phone rings] 3yo: what is that sound?"

"Why are DJ's so bad at fishing? Because they're always dropping the Bass."

"Don't smoke kids... Because smoking kids is illegal."

"All subjects can be funny with the right delivery, Except abortion jokes. Which by definition have no delivery."

"I ran without my headphones today & was reminded that I feel better about my fitness when my soundtrack isn't my panicked gasping breathing."