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Joke of the Day

"Q: What walks on four legs in the morning, two at noon & three at night? A: The bloodthirsty shapeshifter who hides among us. Trust no one."

"""Any idea how to make a lasagne, Barry?"" ""Not a clue mate, but I Bechemal would know"""

"Just beat Guitar Hero on expert in case anyone is looking for a virgin to sacrifice before midnight."

"How can you tell if someone does crossfit? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"Remember when you thought if you accidentally swallowed apple seeds, a tree would grow in your belly? God I miss my 'Thirties'...."

"What's the leading cause of child molestation? Sexy children"

"How do ants hide from aardvarks? They disguise themselves as uncles!"

"I play golf like I have sex I mostly hit 3's and 4's"

"I've done a ton of research and looked at multiple symptom checkers. I went to the doctor and he said I was fine but..... .....I think I may be suffering from hypochondria"

"Double limb transplants are so expensive They cost an arm and leg"