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Joke of the Day

"Had a date with a lady I met on Christian Mingle. It was going fine until I told her I was Jewish & her half of the bill was $40 dollars."

"What has 4 legs, 2 grey and 2 brown? an elephant with diarrhea"

"While walking home from the gym... I saw one of my aerospace engineer buddies at Starbucks. He was buried in his work when I walked next to him and asked, ""bruh, do you even lift?"""

"Day 2 of being Kidnapped. Kidnappers have now committed suicide."

"I swear if I see one more person enter this WalMart wearing pajamas I am going to take the belt off my bathrobe and choke them with it"

"Saw a group of ants carrying a Funyun and it made me wish my friends and I had a giant Funyun."

"The women who are attracted to me all have one thing in common...[your punchline here] write your own punchline"

"I once snuck my cat into a grocery store just to show him what a lazy hunter I am."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic KKK member? He went around killing gingers."

"It is much easier to apologize than to ask permission. "