13522

Joke of the Day

"When I'm out with my kids and I see an x-boyfriend I like to scare him by saying ""Don't make eye contact with daddy."""

"What is Hitler's favorite letter in the alphabet? I don't know, but it's definitely not z's!!!"

"What do 9 out of 10 people love? Gang rape"

"Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the ""no-bell"" prize."

"Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist? He got off on a technicality."

"I almost drowned trying to swim today. The security guard didn't even care he just told me to get the hell out of the mall fountain."

"How to get a guys attention: 1. Take off your shirt 2. Be a TV"

"How does Dalai Lama send emails? With no attachments."

"Why did God invent economists? So accountants could have someone to laugh at."

"The Ottoman Empire... Really loved to put their feet up. (such a bad bad joke)"