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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a really fast seamstress? Tailor Swift"

"Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving."

"Ugh don't you hate it when you accidentally leave the volume up on your phone & the next stall hears the *click* when you snapchat your turd"

"I'm actually not funny. I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking."

"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing... They're both stuck up cunts."

"Why are baby cows considered lunch meat? Because calves are below-knee"

"Teaching 19 to cook, clean, and do laundry so if he ever gets married his wife won't divorce him and make him my responsibility again."

"What do you call a crafty pig? CunningHam"

"Whats the difference between a house cat and a polecat ? How much their husbands make"

"I like my women like my chicken... White meat only."