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Joke of the Day
"I find the best way to deal with death is not to be the person who is dead."
Next Joke
"What's the cheapest type of meat to buy?? Deer balls; because they're under a buck."
"Honey, can we skip that wedding this weekend? ""What? Why?"" It sounds boring and there's no way that couple makes it.. ""It's OUR wedding!"""
"Fun game: if someone wants to shake your hand, sniff your fingers first and then see if they still want to."
"Describe your sex life in two words. ""My what?"""
"How are beer nuts like deer nuts? You can find a small bag of each under a buck."
"Me: We broke up. Male Friend: You okay? You need to talk? Shoulder to cry on? You want to come over? Go to dinner? Sleep with me finally?"
"Two blondes are waiting at a traffic light One says ""It's green."" The other ponders a few seconds, then replies ""A frog"""
"""I'll sleep when I die"" - person who doesn't really understand sleeping or dying."
"When I was a kid, I asked my mom if I could lick the beater. ""Don't be stupid,"" she said, ""your father's not home."""