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Joke of the Day

"It's always awkward ending phone calls with loved ones. I always say, ""I love you"" and they're like, ""thank you for choosing Domino's."""

"We can teach kids there's no ""i"" in team but it's way more important to teach them that there's no ""a"" in definitely."

"Do you know the difference between genius and stupid? ""Genius has its limits."""

"Sick and tired of birds going to any concert they want for free. Maybe get a job and buy a ticket like the rest of us."

"[commercial for college] *person shoveling money into furnace* Narrator: Don't you wish there was a better way?"

"When Martin Cooper invened the cell phone... ... he already got 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris."

"How do you fit an elephant in a Safeway bag? hint: take the ""S"" out of ""safe"" and the ""F"" out of ""way"""

"I texted my boss, ""What's the difference between this morning and your daughter?"" He answered, ""I don't know."" I replied, ""I'm not coming in this morning."""

"What do you call an Italian without arms A speech impediment!"

"What wears a black white and tan coat but has no hair? A bald beagle!"