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Joke of the Day
"Chuck Norris' prostate has eaten dozens of doctor's middle fingers."
Next Joke
"What do you call a belt made of paper? A waist of paper. *knee slap*"
"""I'll just stagger around yelling random, incoherent shit as people try to keep me from hurting myself."" Drunks and 1 year olds."
"When the pope dines with homeless people hes an amazing person. When I do it I'm just another homeless person."
"You know you've seen too many walking dead episodes when your hand gets stung by a bee and you start screaming for everyone to cut it off"
"If Canada was a Kingdom, PM Stephen Harper would be a King... ...but Canada is a country."
"You know how drinks always mention ""Please drink responsibly"" ? ... Well I want to start a beef jerky brand that mentions ""Please jerk responsibly"""
"Here in England, we drive on the right side of the road. If we drove on the wrong side, there'd be a lot more crashes."
"Did you hear about the man who got his entire left side of his body mauled off by a bear? He's all right now."
"What do you call an illegitimate female cow? Miss Steak"