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Joke of the Day

"A baby seal walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""What will you have?"" The seals says, ""Anything but a Canadian Club."""

"I'm going to be very busy in the afterlife. the list of people I'm going to haunt grows everyday."

"""Is anyone here named Jeff?"" Jeff: Yes Geoff: Yeos"

"What does a drug addict and a child have in common? They both want tablets for Christmas."

"if you don't like my new 'southern belle' style of talking i got half a mind to give you the vapors"

"This is a really offensive football joke... So the defense won't get it."

"Why was the vampire's girlfriend mad at him? Because she couldn't finish her sentences. Why couldn't she finish her sentences? He kept eating her periods."

"The Harshest ""Yo Mamma"" Joke... Yo Mamma is like a bowling ball... She likes to get picked up, fingered, thrown down a dark alley, then comes back for more."

"Ever look out the window of a plane and see a huge target on the roof of a Target? Haven't these people ever watched the History Channel?"

"Never pee with the door open, it totally freaks out the other motorists."