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Joke of the Day

"What did the LOTR fan say to the LOTR hater? What are you Tolkien about..."

"Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: They should be changed regularly Both for the same reason"

"Obama is an obamanation. That is all."

"A joke this subreddit will love What's worse than a whale with a sore tooth? When you go to kiss your grandma goodbye and she slips you the tongue."

"Would you like to hear a joke about dried grapes? It's not that good, don't go raisin your expectations."

"Me: Omg all the kids are asleep! I can finally sit and relax! Dog: Yeah. About that. *pukes all over living room*"

"The introduction of Yoga Pants have been found to be the cause of a 0.65 drop in the GPA of Males. I dont have significant data to back this up, But i have some notes from college that show causation."

"advice: describing someone's cupcakes as being ""better than sex"" is only a compliment if you aren't sleeping with them"

"What do you call a walrus that's been hit by a bus? Dead."

"What do you call a man in the middle of the ocean with no arms or legs? Bob"