133122
Joke of the Day
"In my life Ive spent 90% of my money on drugs, drinking and women. The other 10% I wasted."
Next Joke
"""That's not Captain Kirk."" is what I like to say just after the pilot makes his first announcement & then everyone laughs in my head."
"Yo mama's so fat When she backed up her pictures to iCloud, the entire sky fell."
"fur coat daughter tells mom who wears a fur coat daughter: did you know that your fur coat is a result of suffering of an animal? mom: you shouldn't talk about your dad that way"
"Don't be easy to get because you'll be easy to forget."
"Why is poop tapered? So your butt hole doesn't slam shut!"
"Triscuits are a good snack if you've already eaten all the other snacks in your house and the boxes they came in and your own hands"
"What do you call an aborted baby Spawn Kill"
"What does a sheep say after walking into a disgusting, dirty bar? Ew."
"I bought my friend an elephant for her room... She said ""Thanks!"" I told her ""Don't mention it."""