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Joke of the Day

"chuck norris went on a hike up mount st helens on may 18 1980. then he had to take a dump..."

"Batman should teach girls about periods in school... ""Tell me, do you bleed?... You will."""

"What is the best kind of plate for a continental breakfast? ... a tectonic plate!"

"I think I need to put my dog on antidepressants I ask him how his day was. His answer is always ""Rough"""

"Jesus: My God, why have you forsaken me? God: Lighten up drama queen."

"We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn't stay alive."

"What do you call a large gay man who wears dentures? A gummy bear"

"Will is weary of fame Will runs away to the woods Will dons a loincloth Will eats bugs & berries Will befriends a bear Will Ferrell"

"Hey tampon makers, can I get a silent tampon wrapper please? Sounds like I'm opening a bag of Sun Chips up in here."

"Why did the rancher stop attending poker night with his marijuana smoking steers? The steaks were getting too damn high."