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Joke of the Day

"I'm not saying I want a divorce, it's just that sometimes 50% custody sounds pretty appealing."

"Why was the dolphin sad? He had no porpoise in life."

"I know someone that was frozen to absolute zero once. He was 0K."

"Remember when The Backstreet Boys told us to show them the meaning of being lonely and we were like ok"

"My wife and I were happy for 22 years...... Then we met!"

"And Jesus said unto his 12 apostles as he was being nailed to the cross. Don't touch my fucking Easter eggs, i'll be back on Monday."

"What do you get when you shove an iPhone into a blender? Apple Sauce"

"Where did Hitler send his Oranges? The concentration camps."

"What's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when it hits your windshield? Its butt."

"Why do Italians wear gold chains? So they know where to stop shaving."