198069

Joke of the Day

"I lost 100 pounds. Getting mugged in Europe."

"Why did the shark go to the doctors? Because he didn't feel very whale"

"What did the 2 oceans say to each other? Nothing. They just waved."

"How did Marty McFly react when shown what 2015 would really look like? Gee, it's hard to say, although he did seem pretty shaken up about it."

"What is the car that everyone sleeps in? The Ford Siesta Many thanks to /u/ekhappychap for that one."

"My first time having sex was like my first time riding a bike .. my dad was holding me from behind .."

"What did the alien say to Franz Schubert? ""Take me to your lieder!"""

"I may not be able to out run the zombies when they come, but this cheeseburger is going to make me taste great"

"I just thought up a really nerdy joke... How can you tell if a person works in HR or IT? Ask them to pronounce the following: **HIRES**"

"Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Alabama? Otherwise it would have been called a teethbrush."