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Joke of the Day

"My car has started clicking at me. I think it's trying to tell me something, but the jokes on him, I don't speak a single African language."

"The year is 42069. We've stopped changing the date, it's just always the year 42069 and people spell their names with emojis. It's awesome."

"A moderator is browsing /r/worldnews..."

"Did you hear about the explosion in the cheese factory? All that was left was de-Brie"

"What do you call a 2 with a fat ass? A 3"

"if you fap on a plane is it hijacking?"

"I love eating Swiss pancakes. They're like regular pancakes but neutral, so I can eat as many as I want."

"I tried to join a local gang of thieves that were stealing supplies from Chinese restaurants in town. I don't think I made the cut though. They told me to go take a walk."

"How's college supposed to prepare you for the real world? All it does is make you tired and stressed out and anxious and nevermind I get it."

"Most of us are 2 feet away from being a double amputee..."