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Joke of the Day

"We don't have wifi in Tennessee. I just pray my tweets into my phone and let Him (#Christ) do the rest."

"What do you call a broken can opener? A can't opener"

"Depression starts in a part of the brain called the Hippocampus Which is strange because I always thought hippos loved studying."

"Why is the US terrible at league of legends? Because they can't protect their towers."

"There's only 3 types of people in the world. Those that can count, and those that can't."

"Haha no i do not care what people think of me. Why what have u heard tell me everything right now"

"I hired an old German plumber when remodeling my apartment He was a great guy, very reliable and thorough. But it seems old habits die hard. He connected gas main to my shower."

"Is it cocky to have more than one penis? Some might call it too cocky..."

"I just robbed everyone at a Whole Foods Market, armed with nothing but a bag of gluten."

"Guy finds secret trick into heaven... Gods hate him"