131526

Joke of the Day

"Friend request > Poke > Message > Phone Number > Text > Meet > Bang"

"'Pizza Hut, can I take your order?' Me: 'May I speak with the owl, please?' 'Who?' Me: 'Hahaha, that never gets old! Large pepperoni.'"

"I had an issue with my XBone suddenly breaking & emitting smoke... I wasn't too disappointed that my XBone crashed and burned but I couldn't stand the fact that the smoke was even in low-res"

"Policeman: Why are you driving that car in circles? Driver: I was just going for a little spin."

"A young boy asks his Dad :""What is the difference between confident and confidential? Dad says: ""You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, THAT is confidential."

"Did you hear about the butcher's assistant who ditched work to try out for the football team? He didn't make the cut."

"Swans mate for life...in case you were wondering what made them so mean."

"What dog would you want on your American football team? A golden receiver!"

"After this winter I'm so excited for spring... I wet my plants"

"Sylvester Stallone is looking more and more like G.I Joe doll put in a microwave on high for twenty minutes"