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Joke of the Day

"What do Mexican's put under their carpet? Underlay"

"Whats the biggest difference betweens mens and womens soccer? There are more pussies on a mens soccer team"

"Sorry about all the Mario references. I didn't mean to one-up you. I'll pipe down."

"Apparently 1 in 3 households live next door to a pedophile Not me though, I live next to two smoking hot 7 year olds."

"I had a sip of the Milky Way galaxy. It turns out I'm galactose intolerant."

"I stepped on a corn flake Now I'm a cereal killer."

"No thank you GPS. I have this magic ring on my left hand that connects me to the nice young lady in the passenger's seat who knows everything."

"A scientist walked into a room that was -273C Don't worry though, he was 0K"

"Thought I could put dolphin in my fish pie. Until I noticed I was using all porpoise flour."

"They can only rescue about one miner per hour, while all the others wait? Who put the DMV in charge of this?"