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Joke of the Day

"You're Twitter famous. Cool, cool. I won a dodgeball tournament in 3rd grade and I got a real trophy for that."

"What do you call a Jamaican proctologist? The Pokemon."

"Garbage men have Hefty contracts."

"Why did Carrie Underwood run out of cheese? Because Jesus took the wheel."

"Lmao ""bikes"". Basically a shitty motorcycle that you propel with your own legs. What is this, the flintstones?"

"I am so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed."

"first date on the first date with girls we play jenga, show her my pull out game is strong."

"Why didn't the blind man want a seeing eye dog? He wasnt about to take directions from some bitch"

"What's a pirate's favorite favorite letter? You'd think its R but it's actually the C"

"If Eve wore a fig leaf, what did Adam wear? A hole in it."