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Joke of the Day

"My review of Ebert's latest venture: I give it 6 feet down"

Next Joke
 
"I want to write a tweet that is so offensive that it reduces my followers to zero."
"Today, A 12 year-old came up to me and said ""May I please have a cigarette?"". I can't believe kids this age are already so polite."
"Did you hear about Kanye West's son changing his name to South? He felt he his life needed a change of direction."
"Caught my co-worker MICROWAVING a HOT DOG with a SLICE of AMERICAN CHEESE on it. Don't worry I pushed him out a window."
"A pessimist, optimist and feminist Optimist: The glass is half full Pessimist: The glass is half empty Feminist: The glass is raped"
"Why did the vampire take up acting? It was in his blood."
"Do you know what a mice said when it saw a bat? Mom ! I see an angel."
"What's the best way to cheer on an electrician? You con-du-it!!!"
"I had to tell my toddler not to step on the baby. Four times. All my grandchildren from her will be cats."