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Joke of the Day

"A nun wakes up late for church.... She runs out after quickly getting dressed, and asks a small boy, ""Is mass out?"" He replies, ""No but your hat's on crooked."""

"Do you know why Bernie Sanders has gotten as much sex as he's had? Because he doesn't care about position!"

"Today i felt like a giant mushroom I get kept in the dark and fed shite"

"I told my dad about the school shooting today I don't know why he got so worked up over picture day."

"72 virgins This was it. The suicide bomber was going to blow up the US camp. Little did he know that when he woke up he would be surrounded by 72 engineering students...."

"My 6yo's homework today is learning how to count backwards. Yep that teacher knows about DUIs alright!"

"What do all Amish girls want? Two Mennonite"

"How many birds does it take to change a lightbulb? Swan"

"Cop joke A cop accidentally arrested a judge who was dressed like a convict for a costume party. He learned to never book a judge by their cover."

"You're meeting identical triplets tonight. One's from the Army, one's a lifestyle Vegan, and one is a diehard Trump supporter. How do you tell them apart? Don't worry. They'll tell you."