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Joke of the Day

"What do all Amish girls want? Two Mennonite"

"God must be a Republican. He wasn't that into humans until He found His Son was one."

"Life Tip: Do not treat your woman like an object. It hates that."

"Why was there a bug in the computer? It was looking for a byte to eat."

"""Do you want to go out on a date?"" *sweats nervously* I C-CAN'T ""Why?"" *shoots friend next to him* I HAVE TO GO TO A FRIEND'S FUNERAL"

"""BALL SO HARD MUTHAF--KAS WANNA FINE ME."" ""Grandma, just pay the parking ticket..."""

"Drinking wine & throwing away photos of my ex. This is how Lifetime movies start."

"Last week I fought for a woman's honor Apparently she wanted to keep it."

"My mom yelled at my sister "" GET OUTTA MY PURSE!""... My sister yelled back ""I'M TOO BIG TO BE IN YOU'RE PURSE!"""

"A man steps into an elevator with a woman inside... He asks her, ""Can I smell your feet?"" She responds, ""NO!"" He says, ""Oh shit, then it must be your pussy!"""