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Joke of the Day

"Do/Be To do is to be. -Descartes To be is to do. -Voltaire Do be do be do. -Frank Sinatra"

"*16 calls me at office* 16: Are you stopping at the grocery store tonight? Me: No 16: You're out of beer Me: Ok I will, what do you want?"

"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife won't let him use socks anymore."

"The restaurant said they couldn't seat me right away due to lack of waiters I said, ""That's alright, I'll wait""."

"What's the biggest difference between men and women? The phrase ""I went through a whole box of tissues watching that film."" is a good place to start."

"2 Chefs decide to make a Mexican themed dinner for their Anniversary... Chef 1 turns to Chef 2 and utters, ""you and I will make passionate shit together"""

"Is it solipsistic in here... Or is it just me?"

"How do you communicate with a fish? You drop it a line!"

"Shia muslims are not welcome in the City of Brotherly Love... Because it's always sunni in Philadelphia."

"A black guy walks into a bar. And he found himself with a headache as he couldn't read the CONSTRUCTION sign"