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Joke of the Day

"Michael Jackson, too soon? What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One of them walks on the moon, the other one fucks little boys in the ass"

"I hope Death is a woman That way it will never come for me"

"""Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital."" ""Oh my god honey, what happened?"" ""I reposted the same goddamn joke too many times."""

"Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum."

"Okay, let's get this straight. There's no way EVERYONE has the best boyfriend in the world."

"I decided to sell my Hoover... Well, it was just collecting dust."

"Coworker: By your age I was on my 3rd child already. Me: Wow that's a lot of kids to eat in a such a short period of time."

"There once was a girl named Sally with no arms.. ""Knock Knock"" ""Who's there?"" ""Not Sally"""

"I get my wife the same thing every year for Christmas, a dildo and a pair of slippers If she doesn't like the slippers she can go fuck herself"

"What's a gangsta say when a house falls on him? Get off me, homes!"