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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if a person's a vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common? By the time you're finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in. "

"Why don't Muslims fight each other often? Cause they don't want no beef Edit: I'm going to crawl back into my hole now"

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes a long time, and the lightbulb has to want to change..."

"I'd probably be broke by now if there was a website where you could pay to flirt with lobsters"

"The best part of the Grammys was Justin Bieber not performing"

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window."

"Good Morning guys! Just ran 21 kilometers in 2.8 hours. Really didnt know I could have done it. Temple Run is a really motivating game."

"Why is your nose in the middle of your face? because it's the scenter."

"I don't take my shirts to the dry cleaners. If I want to look sharp, I pay the iron price."