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Joke of the Day

"Noah: A boat? God: Yes. Noah: Two of every animal? God: Yes. Noah: I have a better idea. God: What. Noah: Maybe don't kill everyone."

"Me: I don't know how to ride a horse Whiskey: Yes you do"

"I just taped the TV remote to my dogs back so I'll never lose it again. Your move Apple."

"[mom unloads groceries] if there's one thing i love, besides my wild little rascals, it's subscribing to twenty different online tv services"

"ALCOHOL. Because no one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep."

"Why are you so gay? Because you are happy."

"I would settle for life handing me anything citrus right now."

"Will Smith's website isn't responding. What do you do? Refresh Prince of Bel Air."

"I told my friend to stop buying Sonic Comics... He said it was one of his many issues"

"""Do you think the meme war will ever end?"" It may-may not."