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Joke of the Day
"Wow if I squint through the tears I look pretty thin!"
Next Joke
"oh the aliens aren't speaking to us right now because idk they're pissed that we flaked out on that pyramid project they started or whatever"
"Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke's still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, ""Use the forks, Luke."""
"I got lost in a closet as a child... When I came out, my parents, although supportive, really weren't that happy."
"My wife said to me, ""Would you rather have sex with Angelina Jolie or Mila Kunis?"" I said, ""Yes."""
"You know why gay men make such easy prisoners to guard... Because most already have a whistling alarm for when they try to run."
"Events like the death of the Indian gang-rape victim just help remind me why I hate humans so much."
"What did the Mexican girl say to her fiance? You're the Juan!"
"What's the policy at French morgues? Baguette and tag it."
"did you hear about what happened to Nike online shop It shut down by a d-dos"