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Joke of the Day

"[wedding] Priest: repeat after me Groom: after me P: ... [to bride] is he serious Bride: no his name is gary"

"I'm applying for a position as a mall cop.... It has good job security."

"Where does Sean Connery sit? In the toilet."

"Do you know the one step to avoiding Clickbait? Obviously not"

"Why did Paul Walker cross the road? To get to the other side."

"My kids can be difficult sometimes, but my mom always assures me that I deserve it."

"I just saw Iron Lady. Marvel really dropped the ball on that one..."

"I got all my coworkers condoms and bibles for Valentines Day because I'm praying they get laid"

"Why was the dolphin sad? Because it had no porpoise in life."

"When Facebook goes down, everyone comes to Twitter to talk about it. When Twitter goes down, the world falls mute."