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Joke of the Day

"Banning us to the couch is not as bad as you believe it is ladies. It makes us feel manly. Like we're camping. With an angry bear close by."

"Why couldn't the boy look at the Milky Way? He was galactose intolerant."

"I don't have jealousy issues, but I do have ""flirt with my boyfriend one more time and I may have to cut you"" issues."

"How to tell if someone is pedantic Say, ""Hey, you're being pretty pendantic."" If they respond with this, they're pedantic: ""No, I'm *pe*dantic, not *pen*dantic."""

"What do you call a Vicar on a motorbike? Rev"

"Why does Santa have a garden? So he can hoe-hoe-hoe! ^^^^^That's_a_knee_slapper..."

"What do you call a mutant with the power to get women pregnant Impregneato"

"I was having a look... In my mothers bedroom the other day and I found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in her wardrobe. I couldn't believe it... My mothers a superhero!!!!!"

"I used to follow my dreams, but they all got restraining orders."

"If you ain't Muslim... ....you ain't Shiite"