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Joke of the Day

"Why are math students so skinny? Because they buy no meals. (Binomials)"

"So a pirate walks into a bar... A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants. The bartender asks him why he has the wheel on him, and the pirate replies ""YARR! IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS!"""

"*With only office supplies, she diffuses the bomb with 1 second to spare* Boss: What are you doing? Me: *shoves action figures in desk.*"

"My ex was like a computer game. Started off easy, got a little harder and eventually I ended up cheating."

"when i found out i won the World's Saddest Man award i became slightly happy and was immediately stripped of my title"

"If I lived in Alabama, I'd name my daughter, 'Banjo-lina""."

"Nothing makes me worry more than the kids saying ""Don't worry, we cleaned it up"""

"Best advice I can give to newlyweds is to buy a really comfortable couch."

"Why do Nazis hate Canadian summers? They're mostly Julys."

"Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!"