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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the farmer who equipped all his horses with firearms? He was a man who really wanted more bang for his buck."

"What if Jesus actually walked on Walter and that whole water thing was a typo that no one corrected coz there was no Twitter?"

"Friend: [rubs my shoulder] Aw, honey, your life isn't over. It's just beginning! Me: *sobs even harder"

"I hope there's not a huge turnout at my Claustrophobic's Anonymous meeting tonight."

"How can you tell if a shark has dandruff? He left his head and shoulders on the beach."

"What did Muhammad Ali tell ISIS? IsIs? Pretty soon y'all gonna be WasWas !"

"Who is a Minion's favorite politician? First ever president of Zimbabwe, President Banana"

"Being inside a car with kids is like being inside a blender with sticky hyenas."

"someone asked me if i liked having long hair... i told them i didn't at first but it kinda grew on me."

"""How many televised singing competitions are too many?"" ""I don't know, let's find out!"" - Television executives"