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Joke of the Day
"My GF left me because she said I lied about stupid things. I was so upset I ate a car park :("
Next Joke
"ME:John's coming over for dinner. WIFE:Work John or Been to Europe John? JOHN:*from outside* This door reminds me of one I saw in England."
"A journalist is interviewing a five hundred pound man with paper thin skin who is getting a full body skin transplant. The reporter asks if he is excited. He says, ""I can barely contain myself!"""
"Did you ever think that one day you would be this addicted to reading and writing?"
"What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend? Wipes."
"What's the best way to stop a runaway horse? Bet on it."
"Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they're looking for ideas."
"John 3:16. Matthew 3:17. Luke 3:18. It was a very close race."
"If I had 25 cents for every time I failed my math test I'd have $5.13"
"My biggest fear of Hurricane Sandy is that i'll lose power and can't Facebook"