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Joke of the Day

"Fun thing to do: Before leaving someone's house, ask them if you can take a roll of toilet paper ""to go"""

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"Sure, your app can send me push notifications. Just give me your home number so I can call you to let you know I got them."
"That awkward moment when... When Mars has more water than California..."
"There is no Control (Ctrl) button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control."
"Why is their always lightning in France? Obviously, since lightning takes the path of least resistance."
"What did the moderate muslim say to the radical muslim? Hello friend!"
"There's two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says You man the guns, I'll drive'"
"An Italian and a Jew go into business together, who looses? the government"
"How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? ...Yarn"
"What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing."