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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf."

"What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey"

"Somebody wrote ""wash me"" on my car. I'm so lazy, I just wrote ""no"" under it."

"Really Smooth. I lied told my dad that school was canceled. He said,"" lets go see a movie."" We got in the car and he dropped me off at school."

"I heard a bunch of Chinese people chanting ""We want rights! We want rights!"" They must be scared of the dark or something."

"A costumer just said to me that my daughter and I look like twins. And I was like, ""Well, we were separated at birth."""

"What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? Running. Jk. Rolling."

"JESUS: so I'm u GOD: yes JESUS: and ur me GOD: yes JESUS: I don't get it GOD: I do JESUS: how can one of us get it & not the other GOD: whoa"

"I once made a horse laugh and cry. (NSFW) I told the horse I had a bigger cock. He bursted out laughing. I showed him, he cried."

"""Pizza is always good."" - everyone ""We'll see about that."" - Papa John's"