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Joke of the Day

"One time my dad caught me smoking an e-cig so he took me out to the shed and made me smoke an entire VCR."

"Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Two--One to promise he'll do it better than anyone else and one to obscure the issues."

"Q:What did one plate say to the other plate? A:('Lunch is on me!')"

"[NSFW] What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts"

"I bought a Valentine's Day card for everyone at our local Tourette's Society... It's the thought that cunts!"

"If you watch Twitter backwards, it's about millions of socially-awkward people gradually learning how to survive in the real world."

"atom bomb Two rednecks read the paper: the government spent 10 billion $ on a new&improved atom bomb. One of them says: ""please god, let it drop in my back yard"""

"At this point, websites with sudden talking ads have probably taken more years off my life than smoking ever could."

"The less you know, the more you think you do."

"I'm bored Think I will go to the mall, find a great parking spot and sit in my car with my reverse lights on."