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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between sex and US Presidental elections? In sex,the decision to choose the cunt or the asshole is a pleasure"

"Duck Joke Q: Why did the duck go to jail? A: He was selling quack."

"Sperm whales were created when Chuck Norris masterbated in the ocean."

"What did the Scientologist play on his Wii? Xenublade"

"My therapist raped me. Who can I talk to about that?"

"are those elderberries? [camera pans over to reveal a bunch of berries struggling to use the internet]"

"Facebook told me my new password was too long... All I typed in was ""My Dick""."

"Why haven't they sent a woman to the moon yet? It doesn't need cleaning."

"A group of protesters gather outside a physics lab ""What do we want?"" ""Time travel"" ""When do we want it?"" ""Irrelevant"""

"A second child fell into the Cincinnati Zoo gorilla enclosure. Luckily the kid escaped and the gorillas were unHarambed."