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Joke of the Day
"I don't have any of friends to share my video game screenshots with... Because I play video games."
Next Joke
"That hot person you've been flirting with over the internet has one normal arm and one shrivelled T. rex arm."
"Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren't happy."
"How do you get a drummer off of your porch? pay for the pizza."
"What's the difference between lust, love, and just plain showing off? Spitting, Swallowing, and gargling."
"Where does the red teletubby come from? Poland"
"Her; My phones dead let me use yours Me; (throws phone out car window) oh I must of left it at home"
"HER [sits seductively on my lap] The more you tip...the more I'll take off ME [reaches for wallet] This is such a weird way to cut hair"
"A boring joke I totally understand how batteries feel because I'm rarely ever included in things either."
"This whole time I thought Ariana Grande was a font"