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Joke of the Day

"Toddlers & Ghosts -haunt you at all hours -lots of moaning/screaming -unclear motives -not helpful with housework -randomly open cupboards"

"I'm not saying it's been a while, but, the last time a girl got down on her knees for me, she showed me how to tie my shoelaces."

"A hole was found in the wall of a nudist camp... Police are looking into it."

"A man walks into a seafood shop carrying a trout under his arm. ""do you make fish cakes?"" ""Yes we do"" replies the fishmonger... ""Great"" says the man, it's his birthday"""

"What did the singers say right before they had sex? Let's duet! I am so proud for coming up with this one"

"Why don't blind people sky-dive? (from ""Money Train"") Because it scares the shit out of their dogs."

"Where does the Emperor keep all his past dead Sith's gear for display? The Sithsonian."

"I threw my toaster into the toilet the other day. It was a shock to the cistern."

"Gluten free pizza is like a roller coaster that just goes straight."

"Cat Joke just kitten."