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Joke of the Day

"Where does the Emperor keep all his past dead Sith's gear for display? The Sithsonian."

"""I caught a twenty pound salmon last week."" ""Were there any witnesses?"" ""There sure were. If there hadn't been it would have been forty pounds."""

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? Ye'd think it was R, but his first love be the C."

"This isn't rain, it's God slaughtering a giant cloud."

"Two blondes came across some tracks in the woods - and they argued with each other about whether or not it was bear or deer tracks... Until they both got hit by a train."

"My friend said to me, what rhymes with orange I said no, it certainly does not"

"The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence."

"Last night I got so drunk I spent an hour apologizing to a tree for saying it's bark was worse than it's bite."

"On this day in 1947 Chuck Yeager broke the sound barrier, whereas Obama did nothing for America in ALL of 1947."

"Where do spiders play their FA Cup final ? Webley stadium !"