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Joke of the Day

"A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink... The bartender says, ""Sorry, we don't serve mushrooms here."" The mushroom says, ""Hey, I may be a mushroom, but I'm a real fun-guy!"""

"What's the difference between a black person and a monkey? Nothing"

"The Mafia secret What do the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit."

"What do you call a cheat sheet you use for a Philosophy test? A Nietzsche-t sheet!"

"Vet: ""I can see the head... ...here's the neck... ...more neck... ...more neck... ...neck... ...neck... ...neck... ...still more neck... ...neck... ...it's a giraffe!"""

"[sanitation worker knocks at my door] The amount of McDonald's related trash we're collecting from your home each week has us concerned."

"A man gets a $5 hooker a man gets a hooker for $5 and get crabs. the next day he goes back to her and tells her. she says "" what did you expect for $5, lobster?"""

"Why does Felix Baumgartner needs parachute.. when Red Bull gives you wings."

"What did the Australian Chess player say to the waiter? Cheque, mate!"

"So hoola hoops are a thing again... I figured they'd swing in to style again eventually!"