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Joke of the Day

"I hate Mexican jokes... Nunca puedo entenderlos. Edit: The translation of this is ""I never understand them""."

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"How do you measure how sad someone is? With a blues scale"
"What is the captain of the starship enterprise's favorite drink? Picardi and coke"
"""Dad, where do zebras come from?"" Well son, when a referee loves a horse very much"
"Confucius say man who run in front of car... ...get tired."
"Me: Can I have $5? Mom: What happened to the $5 I gave you in 1998?"
"What did the doctor say to the patient who wanted to do his own surgery? ""Suture self!"""
"What do you call a fish with no mouth? A floppy dildo"
"Times are tough, jobs are scarce, I know I don't have the greatest body, but for you single ladies, I'll gigolo if the price is right. . ."
"There were two peanuts walking down a dark alley One was assaulted."