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Joke of the Day

"I feel I'm at my most culturally sensitive when I call Dell tech support and don't scream, ""What the fuck are you saying?"""

"I was gonna vote for trump . . . but now i'm kinda on the Pence about it."

"[Calculus Joke] Why didn't the derivative of sec(x) go to the beach? Because secant tan"

"[radioshack meeting] employee: sir, overall sales are really low. CEO: when did we start selling overalls, bro?"

"I'm so much like a noodle when I shower. sit in hot water for 7-8 minutes and become soft, squishy, and delicious afterwards"

"What do you call gasoline that comes in first place? Win Diesel"

"Some of us learn from the mistakes of others. The rest of us have to be the others."

"This kid who wants 'two front teeth' for Christmas is full of shit."

"I wish MacDonalds would hurry up and put the MacBook on the dollar menu already."

"What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? Full."