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Joke of the Day

"Kind of sad that old people, who have the least amount of time left, are the ones wasting the most time typing in ""http://www."""

"Austim is a lie fabricated by the illuminati and used to promote John Cena"

"A lion would never cheat on his wife... But a Tiger Wood."

"How did the telephones get married ? In a double ring ceremony !"

"So I asked my friend what ADHD was... He told me ""It's was like a better quality version of."""

"Even the coffee is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Wait...am I being poisoned? *drinks it anyway*"

"[Wakes up in hospital after car crash] I'm afraid we had to amputate both of your feet. ""OMG why?"" You were too tall to fit in the ambulance"

"I don't mind comic sans. It's honestly a very well rounded font."

"My haircuts are just like my sex life Usually do it myself and there's a big mess I hate cleaning up afterwards."

"What's the difference between a knife, and an argument with a female? A knife has a point..."