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Joke of the Day

"2yo's favorite cartoon is teaching him about centrifugal force. When I was little, my favorite cartoon taught me never to order from Acme."

"""Hello, 911"" Help I'm being murdered! ""Can you put the murderer on please"" what ""Gotta hear both sides"""

"What are you watching tonight? The game where players make enough money to risk getting brain damage, or the debate where the players already have brain damage?"

"Soccer manager fired for mistake ""Whoops wrong sub"" - Manager"

"What do you call a Pumpkin who eats too much? A Plumpkin."

"What's 9+10? 21 pairs of Deez Nuts"

"My dentist recommended I sleep with a mouth guard, but I'm skeptical insurance even covers who I sleep with."

"What is a cheating wife's worst nightmare? A husband in his hybrid"

"Tape Recording for Beginners by Cass Ette"

"Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat? To the calf-ateria!"